When a ‘Relationship’ is in the state of a ‘Right Relationship’, it is optimized similarly to how human beings are optimized when they embody their divinity. A ‘Right Relationship’ will have constitutional strength, called ‘Energetic Integrity.’ It will display beauty, flexibility, and resilience. A community built on a web of ‘Right Relationships’ will carry these qualities. This community will be aware of the abundance available for everyone, that there is enough for all to be free and safe, a part of the collective, seen, heard, and accepted in their authenticity. Humanity has a long way to go to get to this point.
A community aware of its potential can not occur in a competitive environment where survival and prosperity are prizes won through conflict and rivalry. Our present reality is saturated with this type of competition, creating communities with people lacking basic needs to survive. The solution to our current world crises requires us to get ‘Right’ within ourselves first and then to get ‘Right’ with each other and the world around us.
Many spiritual traditions talk about people awakening into their ‘Right Relationships’, interconnected and mutually beneficial relationships with Universal acknowledgment of the Greater Oneness. I understood the ‘Right Relationship’ idea as clients presented me with many different types of ‘Relationship’ issues and imbalances early in my practice. My guidance was to always work with these situations by energetically establishing the ‘Right Relationship’.
Opening to Source Energies, I intuited how to clear and balance the individual’s energies and then synchronize them with the energy flowing freely in all directions. Working on the energetics of the ‘Right Relationship’ has been an active part of my private practice for over 25 years. Our lives function upon a web of ‘Relationships’ of many different kinds. Each has unique dynamics, but all adhere to the ‘Right Relationships’ tenets. Any type of ‘Relationship’ can vibrate at the level of divinity just as it also has the potential to shake erratically at the level of struggle and suffering.
I want to note that establishing a ‘Right Relationship’ is not about determining what that relationship will look like on the surface or whether it will remain active. It is not about deciding the changes to restore a ‘Right Relationship’. From the perspective of Energy Therapy, it is about restoring the key dynamic points of what makes a ‘Relationship’ ‘Right’ from an energetic perspective. ‘Right Relationship’ is about maintaining equality, connection, balance, and sustainability within the dynamic state of the ‘Relationship’.
Witnessing how this principle works when applied energetically with clients has been a fascinating journey. One common phenomenon I have seen is that a client will often hear from an individual in the days following the application of the ‘Right Relationship’ energy protocol. So many times, I would never have thought of the particular shifts that happened to restore the ‘Right Relationship’. And sometimes, the ‘Relationship’ ended because it was no longer healthy for either person, and they had completed what they came together to learn. In these cases, establishing the ‘Right Relationship’ supported a smooth ending.
As I approach the ‘Right Relationship’ topic, I will discuss what a ‘Right Relationship’ is and is not. A ‘Right Relationship’ is creative, equal, differentiated, connected, and balanced. A ‘Right Relationship’ is not wrong, solitary, destructive, unequal, separated, attached, or imbalanced. Then, I will provide two exercises that you can utilize to re-establish a ‘Right Relationship’ when it has gone wrong. The first exercise includes four steps working with Consciousness: 1. Get Real, 2. Release Judgment, 3. Exercise Forgiveness, and 4. Employ Deep Listening. The second exercise is working with energy, utilizing the infinity flow to establish the ‘Right Relationship’.
WHAT MAKES A RELATIONSHIP ‘RIGHT? AND WHAT DOESN’T?
‘Relationships’ connect all the differentiated forms embodying your life. They occur in the spaces between the different parts of who you are, you and me, and you and your creator. When we hear the word ‘Right,’ it comes with many conditioned ideas about what it means. I ask you to suspend your preconceived notions and judgments to be able to perceive the simple truths about the options you have to choose from. And a note to those feisty, rebellious spirits who don’t want to be limited in life. Finding the sweet spot of the ‘Right Relationship’ provides the greatest freedom and opportunity. In this section I will first define a ‘Relationship’ and what makes it ‘Right’. Then, I will touch upon some of the characteristics or qualities of a ‘Right Relationship’ and what it looks like when you miss the mark.
Relationship vs. Singularity
First, I want to establish that we are discussing a ‘Relationship’. A ‘Relationship’ requires one thing to relate to another thing; thus, it requires multiple things, not just one. The ‘Relationship’ occurs in the space between the two things. Things can come together on different levels. Individuals can have a relationship with themselves on the Individual energy level because a person has many different parts working together, ideally in the ‘Right Relationship’ with every other part. An Individual can have a ‘Relationship’ with another person, which occurs on the Group energy level. Or, an Individual can have a ‘Relationship’ with the Greater Oneness/The Mystery, which happens on the Oneness energy level. A ‘Relationship’ requires things to relate to each other. Thus, is can not occur within a ‘Singularity’ where there is only isolation. Within a ‘Singularity’, no love-based glue exists between you and all else holding, nurturing, and sustaining you. There is a void, a vacuum sucking the life force from your environment.
A ‘Right Relationship’ includes More Than One Part; it is Not A Singularity, even if it is only One person in a ‘Relationship’ with themselves.
Right vs. Wrong
Next, I want to establish the first quality or classification of the type of ‘Relationship’ we are talking about, a ‘Right’ ‘ Relationship’ versus a ‘Wrong’ one. A ‘Relationship’ is ‘Right’ when it is morally good, justified, and acceptable. These qualities create a sustainable, dynamic constitution. It is ‘Wrong’ when it is ethically immoral, unjust, or dishonest. These qualities make a ‘Relationship’ with an untenable, inhibited constitution and vulnerable sustainability. When we get into morals, values, and beliefs about what is ‘Right’ and what is ‘Wrong’, we find a lot of subjectivity and judgment around the topic. For our purposes, you can think of ‘Right’ to mean sustaining life and optimizing the potential available. I will now discuss some qualities and parameters of a ‘Right Relationship’.
A ‘Right Relationship’ is Morally Correct, Not Wrong
Creative vs. Destructive
‘Relationships’ are dynamic entities. In the movement of the changes it undergoes, the energy flow either moves ‘Creatively’ or ‘Destructively’. If it is ‘Creative’, it is growthful, supports evolution, and produces expansion. If it is ‘Destructive,’ it inhibits growth, circulates struggle, and creates diminishment. Religion judges FreeWill choice through the moral lens of good versus evil. In a desire to release any judgmental orientation that is not helpful, I have always thought about your choice to act positively or negatively through the observation of what it produces. So, it is not a matter of whether something is good or bad; instead, it is a matter of whether it generates a ‘Creative’ or ‘Destructive’ flow of energy.
A ‘Right Relationship’ is Creative, Not Destructive
Equal vs. Unequal
Within the dynamic nature of ‘Relationships’ is the individuals exchange of energy and consciousness. The ideal energy exchange and what you see in a ‘Right Relationship’ is an ‘Equal’ exchange. The principle of ‘Equality’ is closely tied to justice, which is why a scale is used to symbolize justice. A ‘Right Relationship’ is an ‘Equal’ ‘Relationship’ and it is a ‘Just’ one. Ideally, each side of the scale and what each individual gives to the ‘Relationship’ is ‘Equal’, but not necessarily the same. We all have unique skills and gifts that we bring, which ideally will compliment what others have to offer. Thus, what one gives to the ‘Relationship’ does not need to be the same material, form, or parameters; it just needs to be equal in energy expenditure. So, when you consider a ‘Relationship’ with another person, to make it ‘Right,’ you need to level the scales.
A ‘Right Relationship’ is Equal, Not UnEqual
Differentiation vs. Separation
In life, there are dividing lines between one thing and another, whether the thing is a cell, a living being, or a whole community. At the edges of the individual thing, the state of being of the perimeter determines if that thing is ‘Differentiated’ or ‘Separated’. A ‘Right Relationship’ is ‘Differentiated’. It contains boundaries and filters at its edges, which protect the integrity of the individual entity while still allowing an interchange between the individuals in ‘Relationship’. In contrast, if a ‘Relationship’ is ‘Separated’, it is walled off and blocked from the exchange of love and nurturing. Eventually, the relationship will deplete its resources and begin to wither. A ‘Right Relationship’ in its ‘Differentiated’ form allows for the life sustaining generation of energy and consciousness. It also allows for the awareness of the Union that exists in the ‘Relationship’, and the understanding that both are a part of the greater Oneness.
A ‘Right Relationship’ is Differentiated But Not Separated
Connection vs. Attachment
The individuals in a ‘Right Relationship’ are always joined by a bond built out of Love. I want to explain the distinction that I am making between ‘Connection’ and ‘Attachment’. Both describe ways that we bond in ‘Relationships’. However, ‘Connection’ is a love-based bond, while ‘Attachment’ is a fear-based bond. In Attachment Theory, it identifies four types of ‘Attachment’ styles, based on the quality of the bond. The first ‘Attachment’ Style is ‘Secure’, this corresponds with what I am terming ‘Connection’, a bond based on Love. The final three types of ‘Attachment’ styles are avoidant, anxious, and disorganized. These three styles all create bonds that are based on fear. They all fall under my overriding descriptor, ‘Attachment’.
A ‘Right Relationship’ is Securely Connected, Yet Not Attached
Balanced vs. ImBalanced
A ‘Right Relationship’ is ‘Balanced’. When speaking about an individual in a state of ‘Balance’, I often refer to that person being free from the Dis in life: Dis-ease, Dis-order, and Dis-array. This same principle applies similarly to any ‘Relationship’ energy field. A newly proposed DSM diagnosis defines a relational disorder as the painful repeating patterns that ‘Relationships’ can become stuck within. The dynamic energy field of the ‘Relationship’ is one of energy in motion staying in motion in a perpetual patterned flow, until a force interrupts it.
Healing in a ‘Relationship’ is a matter of taking the Dis out of the ‘Relationship’, clearing and resolving any ‘Imbalances’ to restore the ‘Balanced’ dynamic points of a ‘Right Relationship’. Below, I offer a few options of ways that you can begin working with the energy of your ‘Relationships’ to return to a natural, balanced and sustainable flow.
A ‘Right Relationship’ Is Balanced, Not Imbalanced
HOW TO RE-ESTABLISH A ‘RIGHT RELATIONSHIP’ WHEN IT HAS GONE OFF COURSE
I want to note an important point here before proceeding. Restoring the ‘Right Relationship’ doesn’t necessarily mean that you will continue an active relationship with someone. Indeed, not if someone is hurting you or unwilling to engage the tenents of a ‘Right Relationship’. Given that we are all a part of a greater collective, we are all in relationship to one another all the time, even if it is a ‘Relationship’ defined by no contact. Relationships are dynamic and complex. Being in a ‘Right Relationship’ is a state of being subject to change from moment to moment.
When you find yourself out of the ‘Right Relationship’ with yourself, someone else, or the world at large, the following four steps work with shifting Consciousness to restore your life’s ‘Right Relationships’.
Four Steps to a ‘Right Relationship’ to All
- Get Real
You must have a clear perspective to Get Real. You must drop the distortions, excuses, and exaggerations to stick to the facts. An honest view of the reality of your ‘Relationships’ is the essential first step to opening the door to changing them. The truth is always the path to freedom, so stop imprisoning yourself. To Get Real means knowing yourself, where you have clarity, and where you still need it. It means dropping your projections to consider what you know based on facts. For instance, you may know what someone has told you, but not necessarily if it is true. You may also observe another but not necessarily know how to interpret what you perceive. Write out the FACTS of the ’Relationship’. Set this aside for a day, revisit and challenge your fact list. Repeat this until your facts hold up to scrutinization and time.
- Release Judgment
Judgment comes from a narrow view, preventing the absolute acceptance necessary to be in a ‘Right Relationship’. To release judgment is not to say you should abandon discernment or discrimination. We have begun this exercise by Getting Real after all. Thus, once you have a clear perspective on your ‘Relationships’, you want to release any judgmental twistings of the facts, prejudices, and limiting ideas about yourself, others, or your ‘Relationship’ dynamics. You can affirm your acceptance and vibrate this type of messaging through your consciousness, repeating it until you can feel and embody absolute acceptance of all aspects of your ‘Relationships’.
- Exercise Forgiveness
Learning the skill of ‘Forgiveness’ is a valuable and fundamental life lesson. Human beings are not all-knowing, perfectly sensitive mindreaders and empaths. When you fully show up and engage in a ‘Relationship’, it is a given that you will make mistakes, get hurt, and hurt others. A ‘Right Relationship’ requires tender compassion to navigate life’s missteps and bumps in the road without escalating minor offenses into damaging wounds. It is helpful to recognize the perfection within the imperfection of life, understand the process of evolution, and understand how challenges allow you to learn, grow, and expand. I want to make a note here about abuse. ‘Forgiveness’ is essential for completely healing the effects of abuse, but as I stated before, a ‘Right Relationship’ does not mean an active one. The importance of ‘Forgiveness’ when abuse has occurred is to take your power back and be able to leave the event in the past.
- Employ Deep Listening
‘Deep Listening’ is the next step after you have gained perspective and reside in a place of acceptance and compassion. A ‘Right Relationship’ has a level of communion. In 2002, I channeled a piece that came through as Source Laws. One of these laws stated, “Communion is the absorption of source.” When you commune in a ‘Relationship’ with a clear perspective and an attitude of acceptance and forgiveness, you are ready for ‘Deep Listening’. To ‘Employ Deep Listening’ open a space within you where you actively receive the other you are relating to. What happens when you do this, is that Source energies are absorbed within the ‘Relationship’ field and automatically form a bond of union. Source energies are the energies of Oneness, embodying the consciousness of Oneness. Open to receiving others with all your senses and invite them to share authentically who they are.
The following exercise works with shifting Energetics to restore your life’s ‘Right Relationships’.
Establish A ‘Right Relationship’ Within The Flow of Infinity:
- Envision yourself centered within a sphere of energy.
- Envision the other (part, person, or energy) within their own energy sphere.
- Now, envision the spheres facing one another with an energy stream in the shape of the Infinity sign flowing around the outer parameters of the two spheres.
- Hold your focus on this stream of love energy infinitely flowing, moving around the spheres in the shape of the infinity symbol. Stay with this vision until you perceive the energy flow as smooth.
This exercise will unite you in a balanced connection that does not compromise either one’s integrity. The infinite flow will hold you in communion, bonded in love. Practice this exercise, and with the unfolding of time, you will be re-established in a ‘Right Relationship’.